Thriving in Tandem
As Kingdom business owners, one of our main objectives is to impact the marketplace in a God-centered way. Yes, we need to make money, but doing it in a way that impacts the multiple bottom lines of people, planet, profit, and eternity. But in the drive to impact the Kingdom, many inadvertently neglect the most important people of all – their spouses and family.
Instead of thriving as husband and wife, they are grinding through life.
I’ve been part of the Nehemiah E-Community for over 13 years and have been involved with Kingdom Businesses in a variety of capacities for longer than that. Every one of them has an incredible heart to make a difference in the world. But with so much time, energy, and focus on the business, many of their families have felt left out.
The business becomes the mistress in the relationship.
My dad was a pastor, and even he struggled with balancing the growth of the ministry and the priorities of the family. You could say he neglected the family for the sake of the ministry. When I started my consulting business, I caught myself repeating the past and working long hours while my wife Kay Lee had to fend for herself.
DO NOT BE CONFORMED BY THIS WORLD
“But we’re doing it for the Kingdom” or “I’m providing a good life for my family” are common excuses many business owners use, including myself. As though sacrificing date nights, watching a daughter’s recital, or Timmy’s soccer game to make money makes it right. Even if it is for the “Kingdom.”
Don’t get me wrong, making sacrifices for the Kingdom is inevitable, but it should not be at the expense of your spouse and family. That’s the world’s mindset. The world’s view says that in order to succeed, you’re going to have to sacrifice your personal life and relationships. After you reach a level of success (which they never define), you can step back and enjoy life and your relationships.
The problem with that strategy is that often, by the time they reach the pinnacle of success, their loved ones are gone. Just ask Jeff Bezos, Bill Gates, and Elon Musk.
You might say, “Those aren’t Christians, and they aren’t Kingdom-minded.”
Maybe, but I could give you a laundry list of well-known pastors and evangelists whose marriage and family suffered because the ministry was put before the family.
It doesn’t matter if you’re Christian or not. If you place anything before God and family, your relationships will suffer.
THE POWER STRUGGLE BETWEEN MARRIAGE AND BUSINESS
You may be shaking your head in agreement but still wondering how can your Kingdom business succeed if you don’t spend the right amount of time on it. The business won’t grow on its own.
When you adopt a Kingdom mindset, you’ll be able to grow an impactful business while you prioritize your spouse and family. You don’t have to sacrifice your relationships for the sake of the business.
The world has a zero-sum mentality. To win in one area, another has to lose.
In God’s Kingdom, you can win in all facets of your life, but you’ll need to have your priorities aligned and make different choices.
KINGDOM SOLUTIONS TO BALANCE MARRIAGE AND BUSINESS
So, how do you prioritize God and family while still having time to grow a Kingdom business?
Here are some tips to prayerfully consider:
- Renew your mind (Romans 12:2) – Stop doing business based on the world’s best practices. Adopt a Kingdom mindset that puts God and family first.
- Put God in charge – Make God your C.E.O., look to Him for daily guidance in the business, and stop doing things with your own strength. He has better solutions. (Proverbs 3:5-6)
- First fruits – Give your spouse and family your best and pray daily together. It brings God into the center of your marriage, and you’ll be amazed at the improved connection and intimacy that will happen with this simple discipline. (Ezekiel 44:30)
- Boundaries – In order to be present with your family when with them, set healthy boundaries between work and home. i.e., Stop checking texts, emails, and messages when you’re off the clock.
- Protect what’s important – Lock in regular date nights, and don’t let anything get in the way. Date nights don’t have to be elaborate. It’s just protected time for you and your spouse.
- Be productive, not busy – Eliminate time wasters in the business so you can get more done in less time. This will improve the business and give you time back to invest in your spouse and family.
If you want to thrive as husband and wife inside and out of the business, you’ll need to get your priorities aligned (God, Family, Business), be present with your spouse and family when you’re home, and put God in charge of your business to find a better way to build.
If you would like to hear more practical solutions for building a business while prioritizing your marriage, consider purchasing our book Tandem: The married entrepreneur’s guide for greater work-life balance or sign up for the self-study course that will be launching soon.
In it are all of the biblically based solutions that have helped our marriage and business succeed that we also pass on to our clients. It covers topics such as vision setting, teamwork, conflict resolution, time management, profit strategies, and business improvement keys.
Being able to Thrive in Tandem with your spouse while building a Kingdom business is possible if your priorities are aligned and you make Godly choices, not the world’s.
Growing a Kingdom business is important, but remember, the Kingdom starts at home. Give God and your family your best, and He’ll bless the rest.
COUPLES IN BUSINESS GLOBAL FORUM
My wife and I will be guest-speaking in the forthcoming Couples In Business Global Forum! The event is free for all paying E-Community Members. Click on the button below to register or find out more:
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