As we celebrate Valentine’s Day next week, we thought this story of couples in business prioritizing their marriage in the midst of building kingdom businesses would serve as an inspiration to you. If you want to learn more about the Nehemiah Couple’s in Business initiative email Gina Tsague at gtsague@nehemiahproject.org
On Thursday December 9, 2021, six married couples converged on the dainty Emerald Coast’s beach city of Destin, Florida on the Gulf of Mexico for an exclusive three-day, three-night couple’s retreat. Part of Nehemiah’s Entrepreneurship Community Couples in Business Life-group of eight couples, the six couples gathered to celebrate, grow and strengthen their union in marriage and business on the continental United States’ only white sand beach where both the sunrise and the sunset can be viewed from the same spot!
Started and moderated by Patrice and Gina Tsague, The Nehemiah Entrepreneurship Community Couples in Business Life-group is a monthly small group of entrepreneurial couples who desire to enhance their intimacy with the Lord while enhancing their marriage and business. The group has been meeting once a month since June 2019 for mutual accountability, encouragement and various discussions.
This December was the first time most of the couples had ever met in person.
It was a sweet reunion of strangers who were no longer strangers for having shared months of fellowship, communion, prayer and commiseration over the ups and downs of marriage, parenting, business, and life. The camaraderie and friendship built over the months of virtual connection was palpable in the warmth, ease and openness the couples shared with each other not only in their first meetings, but in their entire time together. The reunion would have only been made sweeter and complete by the presence of the missing two couples. They were sorely missed.
Thursday Arrivals and Reunion
The first day of the CIB retreat began with gathering at the retreat location. The palatial mansion that housed the group for the weekend is located on Destin’s main thoroughfare and is a walking distance to the beach. The home, affectionately named “Mojo,” can comfortably house 7 couples in separate rooms, and 26 guests in total. The home was spacious, comfortable, and just right for the CIB retreaters. Immediately after an opening briefing meeting conducted by the moderators, the couples loaded into the available vehicles and drove to dinner.
Thursday’s evening meal was at the legendary Boshamps Seafood and Oyster House where only the fresh catch of the day in Destin, dubbed the “World’s Luckiest Fishing Village,” is served daily. Dinner was delightful with starters like Crispy Fried Calamari and Local Blue Crab Claws passed around the table family-style, “The Original” Snapper Destin was the crowd favorite. Towards the close of dinner, the couples were challenged to tip generously after learning that Christians have the poor reputation of being the worst tippers. The server that night, and every night after this embarrassing lesson, received lavish tips from the CIB table!
On Friday December 10th all the day’s well-laid, spread-sheet plans fell to the side as attendees opted to take a walk on the beach before starting the education portion of the day. Meant to take no more than thirty minutes, the walk on the beach took an hour and a half as the couples broke off into little groups engrossed in sweet fellowship and conversation to the relaxing sounds of ocean waves on the shore and the grounding feel of sand in their toes and feet. Gina Tsague had faithfully prayed for the weather and Friday morning had turned out gloriously ideal for a pleasant walk on the beach.
The time outdoors was made all the more necessary by the rich and scrumptious breakfast served up that morning by the cooperative effort of the group. The Mickey Mouse waffles were a hit, and the recipe is still being passed around to date!
Walk on the Emerald Beach
Immediately after the beach the couples got to introduce each of their individual giftings or that which they are already good at. The exercise served as a moment of reflection as each person crystalized that which they already do well. For some it provided a reminder to return to their roots; for others it served to confirm that they were on the right track; and for others still it brought realization that they are not currently engaged in what they do well and ignited a fire to explore ways to pursue their strengths.
After learning each other’s giftings, the group explored the question, “What does success look like for you following this retreat?” Every couple and individual had differing answers. For one it was getting to understand and appreciate their spouse better, for another it was meeting a specified financial goal, and for someone else it was figuring out how to spend time with family without the cares of providing and caring for them. The underlying desire was to depart from the retreat a better spouse, parent and entrepreneur.
Following the second discussion and lunch, the group tackled the question, “What are your areas of need?” Varying needs were expressed by everyone with candor and vulnerability, and each one was received with matching empathy and willingness to stand along-side in pray and support. The common expressed need was wisdom in all things from the marriage relationship and parenting to business affairs and the future. The Lord providentially orchestrated this affirmative and positive first day session as the couples gained valuable insight into each other, and into themselves and their own spouses, and it set the stage for a complete change in the rest of the retreat.
Friday’s dinner was at an Italian restaurant where the group met a server from Kyrgyzstan, a first for most, and enjoyed delicious Italian fare. That night a few in the group concluded the day in a short gents vs. ladies game of Taboo. In this game the group is divided into two teams and each team member takes turns helping his/her team members guess a particular word printed on a card by strictly using only other words (no gestures). The catch is that the team member cannot use a given list of “taboo” words given on the same card. The objective of the game is to go through as many correctly guessed word cards as possible within 60 seconds. The Friday night game generated some humorous moments as the women sailed into easy victory, and it set up a rivalry that was to be settled in an all-hands-in contest the following night.
Friday Night Game
Friday’s deviation from the well-laid-out-spreadsheet plan bled into Saturday December 11th as the lives of couples in business clashed with the retreat’s break from daily business life. There were some previously scheduled work meetings to attend for some, while others intermittently returned business calls and remotely put out emergent fires. In addition, answers from the previous day’s sessions revealed an area of need and growth that wholly upended the retreat’s spread-sheet plan, and Saturday was dedicated to learning at the feet of one of the couples.
Saturday Morning
The previous day this couple had shared that success for them would be to reach a place of spending time with family without being bogged down by the cares of this world, and to have the ability to separate the work they do from how they make a living. In other words, this couple was looking forward to a day soon where they would be earning enough passive income so that they would not need to work for pay any more. Further conversation with the couple revealed that they are well on the road to realizing this success! Not surprisingly, the previously scheduled programming was put aside to give the couple an opportunity to talk to everyone about how they got to where they are. Most of Saturday would be spent gleaning from this gracious couple.
Gracious indeed they were. Through a series of questions moderated by Patrice Tsague, the couple shared intimate details of their marriage and business journey from the early fledgling days to their current place of near complete financial independence. They shared how the Lord moved them from one level of growth to the next level and the next, all the way to a place where they had to give it all up.
The couple’s journey revealed that the road of married life in business is one common to all – lined with relational struggle and difficulty, misunderstanding, miscommunication, and often, mistrust; that it is a path paved with wise decisions and successes as well as colossal missteps and folly; that it ultimately ends with utter despair and death of self, and complete surrender and submission to God Almighty. The couple related how at the point of surrender and submission, God takes the ashes we bring and turns them into something we could never have built or imagined on our own, something beautiful for HIS glory.
In earnestness, the couple appealed to the group to remember that the marriage covenant is the first and only covenant between a married couple, and that it needs to be honored first above everything else. In addition, the men were challenged to cherish their wives and reminded that the onus is on the men to ensure that their wives are walking in tandem with them. This couple will soon be featured in the E-community’s podcast. Don’t miss it!
Anniversary Celebration Dance
Session with featured couple
After lunch, the group had the privilege to throw a surprise celebration for the wedding anniversary of one the couples in attendance. The joy of the moment erupted in song and dance as the anniversary couple cherished the commitment of 28 years of a life and love shared and built through all the seasons they have weathered together. It was a singularly spectacular and special moment.
The rest of the day was free time spent shopping, doing yoga on the beach and resting.
Dinner at Louisiana Lagniappe
Dinner on Saturday night was a dress-up affair at Destin’s fine-dining Louisiana Lagniappe. It was a warm, conversational dinner, and even though grouper fish appeared to almost be the only fish on the menu, everyone found something they could eat and enjoy. The evening wrapped up with each gentleman walking out of the restaurant with his bride for a group picture, and despite one in the number needing to be hilariously reminded to go fetch his wife, the couples were all smiles and giggles for the “last supper” photograph.
Upon returning to the house, before the Taboo tournament between the gents and the ladies, the couples gathered for everyone’s final take-away statements and closing remarks by the moderators. This session was capped by communal prayer in gratitude for a memorable retreat and for the Tsague’s and their ministry.
The long-awaited Taboo rematch began with raucous taunts from the more competitive members of the group (the men) in an attempt to intimidate the women. Just like the night before, amid much loud, rib-breaking laughter, the women won the first round of the game. Being ones to never take defeat, the men demanded a second round. Unfortunately, the men lost! Again, the gals soundly and decisively defeated the guys, and the matter laid to rest. As couples retired to bed, however, there were heard disgruntled mumblings of “… not allowed to use both sides of the brain…,” and “… the women cheated…” Great fun was had by all, and it is said that the men are staging a vicious come back at the second CIB retreat next year.
Having fun at Taboo
Sunday morning dawned with everyone cleaning up and packing for the great exit out of the couples’ lovely rental home of three days and three nights. Three of the couples had early departures while three couples got to share another final breakfast meal at a local restaurant. At the end of Sunday December 12th two couples enjoyed a spectacular sun set on the 2021 E-Community Couples’ In Business retreat in Destin, Florida.
Aside from proving that women trump men in the game of words (Taboo), this retreat brought together couples from varied backgrounds and nationalities, and demonstrated that a time of vulnerable, authentic fellowship is a vital lifeline for the unique dynamic of couples doing business together. The Lord had His way with orchestrating each family unit present at the retreat and with conducting the agenda. Even though taking a break is an immense opportunity cost and sacrifice for a business couple, prioritizing the marriage relationship is priceless gain. If you and your spouse are looking to enhance your intimacy with the Lord while enhancing your marriage and business in a community of committed, Christ-loving, like-minded couples facing the same unique challenges of couples together in business, consider joining a CIB Life-group. The current Couples in Business Life-group has a few more spots for new couples and will cap at a maximum of 12 couples. The vision is to build and grow more and more 12-member couples’ life-groups throughout the Nehemiah Entrepreneurship network. As the CIB couples look ahead and plan for next year’s monthly meetings and yearly retreat, they look forward to reports of numerous couples’ life-groups meeting and retreating worldwide in locations as beautiful as or even more stunning than the Emerald Coast of Destin, Florida.
If you want to learn more about the Nehemiah Couple’s in Business initiative or join a couples in business lifegroup, email Gina Tsague at gtsague@nehemiahproject.org
