They Shall Become One Flesh

WEEKLY DEVOTIONAL BY PATRICE TSAGUE

If, as a married person, your life suddenly ended today, would your spouse know enough about your business affairs to provide the leadership to progress to the next stage of the business? 
Are you walking as one with your spouse?

They Shall Become One Flesh

Unfortunately, many Kingdom business stewards operate their businesses separately from their mates. They see the business as theirs alone, and so, the only contribution that the business makes to their marriage is the financial provision that it brings to the family. Business can be a great tool that brings couples together and strengthens the unity in a marriage – or – It can become a tool that forces couples apart and introduces stress to a marriage. It is important for Kingdom business stewards who are married to realize that you are operating a family business, whether your mate is actively involved in it or not.  

Sadly, many entrepreneurs, particularly males, have historically committed grievous errors by excluding their spouses from their business affairs, and many female entrepreneurs are modeling those same bad behaviors today. But these errors cannot be blamed solely on the world. At least some of the responsibility rests with the church in the way it has traditionally taught about headship and dominion. The dominion mandate given in Genesis 1 was not given to the man alone, but to both the man and the woman.  

Then God said, “Let us make man in our image, according to our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the seas, over the birds of the air, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. – Genesis 1:26-27 (NKJV)

When the Bible refers to the original “man” being made in the image and likeness of God, it is not referring to the male gender but rather to mankind, which combines both male and female, and to their potential spirituality, moral integrity and holiness, and dominion over the rest of God’s creation. But God also saw that it was not good for Adam – the man – to be alone, and in Genesis 2:18, He said, “I will make a helper suitable for him.”

The Hebrew term translated as “helper” is “ezer kenegdo”, which has many meanings, including “to be counterpart, opposite, or alongside,” and also “to be strong, to rescue, or to save.” God took one of the man’s ribs and created the woman from him. Adam saw that Eve was both opposite and equal, different yet perfectly complementary, and this is why he rejoiced in her and affirmed her by saying:-

“This is now bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called ‘woman,’
for she was taken out of man.”
– Genesis 2:23

They were two separate beings, but operating as one in soul, mind, and spirit. 

How does this concept of the oneness and complementary nature of a husband and wife relate to the concept of the man being the head of the woman? In 1 Corinthians 11:3, the apostle Paul wrote, “But I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.”

Firstly, if a man is going to be an effective head of a household, Christ must be his undisputed head.
But we also need to understand that headship speaks of order, and oneness speaks of unity of purpose.
Christlike headship is akin to servant leadership. Headship within a marriage cannot be effective without oneness in the marriage. If there is headship without humility, or headship without oneness, it will be dysfunctional. Headship without oneness leads to stress, and can also lead to separation, or even eventual divorce.

How do you know if you are not operating as one flesh with your mate in business?

1. It is “your business” and not “yours and theirs”
2. You do not involve them in the major decisions of the business 
3. You never have family business meetings 
4. You do not see them as an asset in the business 
5. You do not embrace their ideas 
6. You intentionally keep them out of the loop
7. If you were to die, they would have no idea how to continue or exit

How do you walk in oneness?

1. Declare the business as a family business
2. Establish a family advisory board or board of directors with regular meetings
   (monthly, quarterly, or biannually)
3. Make sure your mate understands the vision and general goals of the business
   and how it connects to God’s plan for your family 
4. Do not make any major decisions without involving your mate,
   and make sure you both are in agreement. 
5. Refer to it as “our business” rather than “my business” 
6. Pray together about the business 
7. Seek a business coach to guide you if necessary 

Marriage is one of the greatest institutions that God created, and it should be a place of great fulfillment and reward. A dysfunctional marriage, however, can be more destructive and restrictive than a prison. It is better not to marry than to marry and not be committed to enjoying the best that marriage has to offer. 

Your business can either be a tool that God uses to enhance fulfillment in your marriage or a weapon used by the enemy to incite division. You must be committed to seeking God’s wisdom and guidance as to how to walk together with your mate in the business, and to “catch the little foxes” (SoS 2:15) by never giving place to the enemy by putting your business before your spouse. The rewards will not just be fulfillment in the marriage, but can also lead to business growth.

My prayer for you today is that God will give you the grace to walk in oneness with your mate in business so that you can glorify Him through your fruitfulness in the marketplace.