Love is Not Puffed Up

“Pride goes before destruction, And a haughty spirit before a fall.” — Proverbs 16:18

Are you prideful? Do you think more of yourself then you ought to think? Is your pride hindering you from loving others?

It is almost impossible to grow a successful business without feeling a certain level of pride. In fact, it is almost a necessary ingredient to be a successful entrepreneur. Yet the Bible warns us against pride and even suggests that it can lead to failure. Pride leads to failed businesses and failed relationships. Some level of pride is acceptable, but too much pride leads us to being puffed-up. Where is the balance?

In the fifth attribute of love described in I Corinthians 13, the Apostle Paul again tells us what love is NOT. He declares love is not puffed-up. What does that mean? To be puffed-up means to inflate ourselves. We have all heard people refer to someone as ‘“full of themselves” – another word for puffed-up. They think more of themselves then they ought to think.

In Romans 12:3, after instructing the believers in Rome not to conform to this world but to be transformed by renewing their mind, the Apostle Paul gives us another word about being puffed-up or full of ourselves. “For I say through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, as God has dealt to each one a measure of faith.”

How does being puffed-up hinder us from loving others? Well, have you ever seen someone who was full of themselves focus on other people? Likely not, since it is always about them. Everything is about what they have accomplished, what they can do and what they will do. They don’t listen to others and are not sensitive to the needs of others. They are often so full of themselves that they actually think they are doing you a favor by talking about themselves.

How do you know when you are puffed-up?

• You talk more about yourself then you listen to others
• You are always justifying your behavior
• You cannot see your own weaknesses
• You are always bragging about your accomplishments

To avoid being puffed-up, you must be focused on others. For example, for everything you say about yourself, seek to know two or three things about the other person. Appreciate and affirm what others bring to the table and avoid allowing your pride to inflate you. Loving others unconditionally can be difficult because it really requires us to die to ourselves and value others as much as we value ourselves. This does not only prevent business and relationship failure but it also will lead to great fulfillment in your life.

My prayer for you is that God will give you the grace to avoid being full of yourself and value others as much as you value yourself.