Blonde _ field yellow flowersYesterday – as I sat in church listening to our guest speaker, marriage counselor Dr. David Clarke – I reminisced back to when I was first saved.  June 13, 2001.
I had no idea who the Holy Spirit was…or how this thing called “sanctification” was supposed to work.
In fact, I was still having a tough time figuring out what all those “Christian-ese” sounding words even meant?
I was not raised in the church.
Not that we were antagonistic toward God.
We went to church on Christmas and Easter…said a blessing before bed or a meal every once in a while…I simply did not know there was anything more???
Then…as only God can do…
He allowed the circumstances of life – AND my own self-centered choices and decisions – to take me to that place Christians call:  “coming to the end of yourself”.  Or as I would have said it:  “I finally got desperate enough to look up for help…
Marriage – Divorce – Trying to blend a family!?!
Career-climbing – Striving – Keeping up with the “Joneses”    
Running…Hoping…and then…my son – lost in drugs and alcohol.  Nothing “I” could do had any impact on his path.  Nothing I could do caused Him to want to get better.  
And…in the midst of all that…there was a marriage that was the victim of two broken people, coming together.  Both hoping that this time we could get it right.  Yet seriously underestimating the baggage we carried  into the relationship.
Baggage????   More like steamer-trunks!
All of this – without Jesus in our lives.
Yet – He is faithful.  Even when we are TOTALLY  lost and unaware of this presence.
He never leaves us…He never forsakes us…He never – ever – gives up!!!
Then…as only God can do….  
I bowed my knee to Jesus…and just 30 days later, Tom did as well.
And they lived happily ever after…NOT!!!
But…here is what did happen.
I have known it for some time now…but it has been slow and incremental.  Sometimes almost imperceptible.  
Yet…real…profound…and sure.
The sanctification of two people…a marriage…and a broken – pieced back together – family.
As Dr. Clarke talked about what real heart-felt communication and intimacy look like – I began to see just how far we have come.  
Only then…could the layers of “me” be peeled back to make room for “us”.
Only then could I seek forgiveness vs. self-righteousness.
Little by little…through the power of the Holy Spirit – God has made BIG changes in both of us!  
Only then has it been possible to truly experience what it means for “two to become one”!
Then…as only God can do…
With the exchange of a smile…a few simple words of confirmation – Tom and I  drove home grateful for the sweet sense of peace that has become our marriage!
Yes.  Little by Little = BIG!

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